February 2012
3 posts
No Title
Monday, 27 Feb 2012
Hello life..
This time, you really exhaust me.. My mind, body, and soul are weary..
I can’t do anything…
There’s no help from anyone..
And even prayers are unanswered..
I can’t hold on any longer.. I’m tired..
Please… Please.. Please end this..
If not, please end my life instead..
Please God… I beg of You…
LDS
T. S.
Saturday, 11 February 2012
Measure the weight of my soul..
Measure the pain I’ve been going through
Things that you people call “a test from God”
Each and everyday is bringing me to my defeat
I’m walking around like a zombie, empty and without a soul
Been asking, crying, and begging for help..
No one, nobody answers..
even prayers are unanswered..
If...
The One That Got Away
Friday, 3 February 2012
In a bus.. on a long roadtrip to the city..
Moments ago I just lost you..
No words can describe the sadness..
You brought along with you a part of me..
“In another life.. You would be my girl
So I don’t have to say you’re the one that got away..”
LDS
January 2012
1 post
I do cry at night..
Dear God..
I’m tired.. I’ve had enough problems already.. Please.. I beg you.. Please.. Please..
I can’t comply no more.. I don’t have the strength to do this.. I can’t..
I beg of you.. Please.. If you can’t take the pain, then please take my life instead..
LDS
December 2011
2 posts
Pre Christmas Thoughts
24th Dec 2011, 00.35 AM
Hello..
Right now I’m starting on Urology rotation.. The 1st Batch in Medan.. Its like going into a jungle with no preparation and trying to survive with every bit of skill and a lot of dumb luck..
On the other end, my social life is dropping to zero level.. I rarely go out, not because that I can’t, but more because I don’t feel like it..
I miss...
November 2011
2 posts
Me Estoy Muriendo 2
Thursday, 3 November 2011
Again, I’m bowing to you and begging for Your help..
I’m tired.. I think I’ve done my best, and now its time for me to accept that I can no longer continue..
I’m tired, I’m depressed, I’m about to get sick
LDS
October 2011
5 posts
September 2011
15 posts
Never Better...
Being Heartless Is A Necessity
28 September 2011
In my line of work, it’s easy to become heartless..
Just yesterday i watched a mother cried over her son’s dead body who died because of a traffic accident. And the thought that crossed my mind
“Well, that’s what you get for riding motorcycle carelessly and didn’t bother to wear helmet.”
But don’t judge me just yet.. i did try to...
The Mind Is A Terrible Place
10th Sept 2011
The mind.. A dark gloomy place, where every dark and evil creatures lurk..
My mind was such as that.. It is filled with ugly, bad, and evil memories..
Regret is one of those evil creatures, the most sadistic one.. It came to you unnoticed, and pummels you when you’re defenseless..
Memories flashing in front of your eyes, and the most evilish word in this ugly world...
“If You Can’t Think Straight, Drink Straight !!!!!”
– No Name
Post Holiday Syndrome !!!
6 Sept 2011
A few days after the long awaited holiday..
Happy…
But then again, it was always fun and happy everytime I see my friends back home..
People that matters… People that I can count on.. People that I trust..
A week full of fun, happy go lucky encounters, unexpected stuff, and drunk till drop parties..
Always, always, always FUN !!!!!!!!
Thank you guys for...
June 2011
2 posts
IF ONLY
16 June 2011
A few days ago I got a bbm around midnight.. A friend is having beers with some people, and suddenly he said that I should add a person’s BB pin..
And then.. I add the pin number…
We’ve been introduced before, yet, she seems to have forgotten.. Hahahah..
And then another thought pops up, ” If only this had happened sooner..”
So there goes,...
Hung Around
2 June 2011
All I can say is..
I could be somewhere else right now..
Drinking out in Singapore
Or
Hanging out in Jakarta
But,
I chose to stay here, for you.. Yet…
May 2011
1 post
Pramodana
28 May 2011, Saturday
Today starts just like any other ordinary day
I woke up, go to the hospital and do my daily routine there. And suddenly there’s this bbm that I truly didn’t expect.
Pramodana.. One of my oldest bestfriend.
The one thing that hits my head hard is that
“Someone who believe that there are magic,dragons,and demons is naturally a good person”
...
April 2011
2 posts
Me Estoy Muriendo
Medan, 24-4-2011
What I am now, is just like the title to this post…
“Me Estoy Muriendo..”.
It feels like I’m in a dark place struggling to find a way..
Tired of struggling, tired of trying..
This isn’t like taking a leap of faith, I could just jump and eventhough I crash hard, everything is clear and I can try to walk again..
This is like being trapped in...
March 2011
2 posts
Brush Up Your Heart
1-4-2011, Medan
Another month, a lot of trouble..
March is exhausting.. I got caught up on many many stuff.. Troublesome..
An incident forces me to get out of the house and find a new place, it was hard, but finally I found a new place.. Hopefully this time, I don’t have to go anywhere anymore.
And to close this troublesome month, I got myself an idiot who was trying to kill me, just...
Kalah Judi
Medan,15 Maret 2011
Kalah Judi..
Ya.. Mungkin seperti itulah keadaan saya belakangan ini.. Beberapa teman bilang wajah saya nampak nelangsa, beberapa bilang seperti lagi ngambek.
Ha ha ha.. *tawa getir*
Ngambek ya.. Ngambek sama siapa ? Sama takdir mungkin…
Nampaknya saya lelah.. Lelah menjalani hidup yang belum seberapa ini..
Lelah badan
Lelah jiwa
Saya.. L E L A H
...
A hopeful letter
Its been more than 2 months since I left Jakarta..
Hopefully, next week I can go home and meet you…
Medan, 8-3-2011
Verne
January 2011
3 posts
You Don't Know How Wasted I Am On The Night Of...
12 Jan 2011, Medan
This morning I woke up to find a lot of mention on my twitter timeline. Apparently a friend of mine has a new boyfriend. What surprises me is that her boyfriend’s twitter ID is a name that I saw a lot in someone’s timeline…
Yes.. Its your timeline dear.. And all of a sudden, I got caught up reminiscing everything..
I still can’t understand how idiot...
Its just the beginning
7 Jan 2011
Just got home after 5 days straight at the hospital.. Never have crossed my mind that there will be moments like this..
I’m tired, stressed out, and most of all, I’m “friend-sick”.
I miss my friends back home, I miss the “duduk-duduk” session, I miss Casa moments, Canteen moments, the hipsters, everything…
Dear friends, if you read...
December 2010
1 post
Another Black December
23 Dec 2010
Its been a year since I start writing here..
And its been too long since my last update..
So here goes..
in a week I’d probably have left for Medan, leaving Jakarta for approximately 5 years. I guess I’ve done too much problems and troubles lately, hahaha.. Few people delete me from their messenger contacts, few unfollowed me on twitter, and on top of it, all those...
November 2010
1 post
“I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse”
– The Godfather (1972)
October 2010
1 post
Life’s fucked up… Yeah, right..
September 2010
4 posts
#EMERGENCYROOM
A new hashtag that I’ve been putting on my tweets everytime I’m doing shifts in the ER.
Some enjoys, some are scared, and some just wanna puke.
Hahahaha..
The Dark Side Of The Moon
Tuesday, 21 Sept 2010
Another Blow.. Another Pain..
I know that you’re acting like this because you care about me. I know that..
But I’m sorry.. Its just that that is my flaw and I’ve tried reduce it..
And I’m a bit disheartened, because you said that you’d understand that part of me..
I’m not mad.. Honestly.. I’m just a bit disheartened..
I...
“Sometimes, the simplest thing is the hardest thing to do..”
August 2010
11 posts
Happy and Interesting Night
31 Aug 2010
11.20 pm
Yes.. Today is my birthday and the day is almost over.
I just want to say, Thank You God for everything you’ve given to me..
For all the friends that cared and supported me..
For my very very understanding and caring family..
And thank You for the greatest gift that I receive for my birthday, Indira Priyadarsini..
Thank you for the surprise dear,...
Major Let Down !!!
26 Aug 2010
After the last 2 posts, yeahh..
Just read the title.. It explains right ?
So.. This person said ” I’m sorry, I just don’t think you’re the right man for her. You’re a good kid, but I think she needs someone a bit more mature.”
This person happens to be one of my closest friends, the one I consider a brother in all but blood.
...